First snowman

Here it is mid April and we are still getting snowstorms. The good news is it stays light until 7:30 or later, so I can play outside with the girls after work.

Today we got 8 fresh inches of moist sticky snow. I was so excited about getting home and building a snowman with the girls. We did the best we could with them insisting that I not help. Stuck a few facial features on and a few sticks for arms. Added my hat and mittens, and viola, snowman.

The girls are calling it "Tinman". I look at Colleen like - huh? Colleen explains she and Grammy had introduced the kids to the Wizard of Oz while I was at work one day. And Grammy has this three foot tin man made out of coffee cans, which the girls really enjoy.

So Tinman it is.

The girls want to kiss the tinman, hug it, have photos taken with it. Meron built it a little snow toilet in which to go 'po-potty'. A little too realist for me.

Fast forward an hour and we're putting the girls to bed. They are all upset that the tinman will be outside alone all night. They insist on going to the window to blow him a kiss and leave the outside light on so he will not be in the dark all night.

Adoption Trip Day 8 Friday Feb 9

As soon as I wake up, I know this is going to be one of the most emotional days ever. Saying goodbye to the staff will be hard, but at least we know we can visit here again in the future if we want, and we can mail things through Wide Horizons if we want.

I grab one of the guards and race to a photo shop to buy frames. All the staff want photos of our girls. Luckily I brought about 100 copies, so I have plenty of photos, plastic envelopes in which to place them, and frames for the guest house and big kids house.

Today I want to video the kids saying their pre-meal prayer, so Pete and I race to the big kids house for lunch. It is so sad seeing these kids for almost the last time, and knowing that I will be leaving them soon. Pete and I have to leave because our eyes are starting to tear up.

The farewell ceremony begins at 4PM in the big kids house. All the staff are dressed in traditional Ethiopian garments. There is festive food like cakes, cookies, and popcorn. Balloons for the kids. The nannies preside over a traditional coffee ceremony.

Then Dr. Tsegaye says a few words revolving around the theme that "children are a gift from God, regardless of whether they come to you through birth or through adoption". Then he thanks the families for their generosity. Then he officially transfers stewardship of the adopted children, one family at time, by kissing the children goodbye and handing the parents their official adoption and travel documents. THis is when it starts to hit home hard.

Next the children sing and dance a variety of songs in English and Amharic. The last song is the hardest. The children staying behind call out their adopted colleagues one at a time to dance in the center of the circle. They sing a verse in Amharic, then "Sister Meron, see you again. Sister Emneti, see you again." There is not a dry eye in the room, while these verses are sung.

And then its an official goodbye. Colleen and I wrote our phone and email on the back of several copies of our girls photos, and handed them to children who were the closest to our girls. Through a translator, we asked them to hold tightly to these photos, and give the photos to their new parents in America, who will then know how to contact us. We truly hope this happens.

Then its back to the Guest House for a quick dinner, and then to the airport for our flight home.

Adoption Trip Day 7 Thurs Feb 8

We visited the big kids house this AM. Meron came running out of the sun porch and across the courtyard to me. She had this great smile going and we played for awhile.

Then, suddenly, Meron was scared to death of me. She went into a panic, screamed hysterically, and curled into a fetal position. This was immediately after one of the Nannies said something to her in Amharic. I believe the Nanny said something about the guesthouse and that set Meron off. So we left to give Meron some space.

This afternoon we commandeered the van, Mulat the driver, and several of the nannies to take the older kids swimming at the Hilton. It was supposed to be Yohannes and Rowina, Abrahm and Rahel, Abdit, and Nathaniel. Lidet's mother said 'No'. Then we had, Tsehaye, this little stowaway hiding between Yohannes and Abrahm. Nobody had the heart to kick her out.

The kids had a ball in the pool, and Pete and I had a ball playing with them. They are so well mannered and well behaved. They really enjoy each other and they really appreciate having opportunities to do cool stuff.

I'm not sure the Hilton was happy with us bringing a vanful of orphans to their pool, with its deck littered with socialites and jetsetters. One snotty guard looked down his nose at us and asked who was going to pay the pool membership fee. Believe me, next time we are bringing six vans full of kids and we will plan to stay longer than an hour and a half. In fact, we may stay for lunch or dinner.

Back to the big kids house. This is the last night before we leave to come home. We have to get the girls to spend the night with us. Meron is just totally bummed, like a zombie. We take her into a den and start talking to her. No response. The social worker comes and speaks Amharic to her. No resposne. We offer her cookies and soda. No response. We are just heartbroken trying to imagine all the thoughts and confusion racing through her little head.

Finally the social worker suggests bringing in one of Meron's girlfriends, Rowina, to speak with her. Rowinia comes and tries to get Meron to sing or dance. No response. To play cards. No response. Finally, we ask Rowina to ask Meron what is wrong. Meron slowly looks up at Rowina, rolls her eyes, and says (in Amharic) "I am so bored in here. Why can't we just go outside and play?"

I was so happy with relief that I didn't even care. It's killing me to think I've known Meron for less than a week and she already owns me.

Adoption Trip Day 6 Wed Feb 7

This morning we went early to the big kids house to observe the morning routine.

The children form two lines, then the nannies proceed down the line dispensing a vitamin tablet, a face wash, and lotion. Then they pledge allegiance. Then they do a gym class which involves some dances and some games. Then as song about "this is the way we brush our teeth, brush our teeth, etc" which goes on for about 7 verses and ends with "this is the way we go to class". and they all march into the class room.

Yohannes and Abrahm are great helpers to the nannies. They keep all the kids in line and the kids respect them. Y and A are not bullies at all.

We returned after class and broke out the jump ropes. The kids had a ball with them, and some of the kids can do some really advanced tricks. Around the corner Meron was getting her hair washed. She looked like Don King!!! It was hilarious. Then later her hair was braided with very fine and intricate design. Meron looked beautiful. She really is a beautiful kid.

While the kids took their afternoon nap, Pete and I went shopping for a goat. I knew a goat costs about $25, but the goatherder started me at $200. I finally convinced him I knew the real price and I bought the goat for $35 (the extra ten I paid him for entertainment value). The herder taught me how to walk a goat like a wheelbarrow by picking up its hind legs. Then he is complimenting about what a fine negotiator I am. Going on and on about how I drive good bargains, I am smart American, and I should be very proud of myself. After all that he smiles , grabs my wrist, and says "So. now you buy cow?"

This evening we went to get the girls to spend the night with us at the guest house. To get them used to us and all. Meron was having none of that. She went into full panic mode. Kicking and screaming at everything and everyone. The violence she displayed was almost shocking. If she wasn't so tiny and so otherwise timid, I am sure it would have been terrifying.

We gave up that ship and decided to try again tomorrow.

Adoption Trip Day 5 Tues Feb 6

Today Meron came running across the courtyard of the big kids house to greet me. I love her smile and her giggle.

We played with the kids for a few minutes, but our timing was bad as we arrived just before they are scheduled to go to class. Mental note for tomorrow.

Adoption Trip Day 4 Monday Feb 5

We set out for the return to Addis at about 6AM. Now we know why Wide Horizons does not permit night driving. The road is just as busy as in the day - clogged with donkeys, goats, carts, bikes, trucks, and people - but nobody wears lights or reflectors. It's like a video game in which these shapes pop out of nowhere at high speed. Total insanity.

Interestingly, we also saw two road killed hyenas with their eyes wide open and their teeth bared. Hideously scary beasts. And we saw a road kill donkey totally coated with vultures. We only knew it was a donkey because the birds on its head jumped when our SUV brushed past.

Finally back in Addis, today is US embassy day. We all piled into the van - Meron on my lap and Emnet on Colleens. As we ascended the embassy stairs, an Ethiopian woman in her 20s whispered to Meron "You are such a lucky girl." We sure hope so.

After the embassy formalities we all returned to the guest house. The nannies put on a video of the coffee ceremony dance and all the kids danced to it. They are so cute.

That evening Tsegaye treated us all to a traditional Ethiopian feast and dance. One dance was killer. Two ultra hot babes come onstage in these skin tight fire engine red dresses. The entire dance involves them whipping their heads and hair around in a figure 8 like pattern - really fast like their neck is a spring - while erotically massaging their breasts. Dear God. I would easily have won a YouTube contest with this if Colleen hadn't torn the battery out of my camera and beat me over the head with it.

Adoption Trip Day 3 Sun Feb 4

We awoke at 5AM today for the drive to the birth village in Awassa. On the road by 6. It is amazing how alive Africa is at 6AM on a Sunday Morning. The roads are clogged with people, bikes, goats, donkeys, cattle, chickens, dogs, trucks and busses. It is like a circus.

Our driver, Solomon, arrives in this huge shiny maroon land cruiser. It is totally pimped. Pete is especially psyched because he loves to go four wheeling.

Solomon navigates the clogged roads for the next 4 hours. He uses his horn about 30 times for each time he taps the brakes. One quick toot means "No way am I slowing down". One long toot means "I know you're bigger than me, but I won't back down". Solomon just barrels down these narrow roads, dodging and weaving, and missing untold obstacles by mere nanometers. It is harrowing.

We saw dozens of road kills - mostly dogs, but also goats and donkeys. I was laying down heavy odds that we would witness a fatality, but we did not.

Midway we stopped at a game park. We saw gazelle, ostrich, and warthog. The scenery was gorgeous and we explored an area of hot springs. I mean really hot springs, that burn to the touch.

Finally we arrive in Awassa at the office of our social worker and interpreter, then on to meet the birth family of Meron and Emnet. The route followed a fairly major paved and divided highway, then turned abruptly left on to a narrow, wet and muddy alley road. The family homestead is about 100 yards down the alley on the left.

It is a postage stamp size lot fenced in with scrap wood and tin. Inside the gate was an L-shaped building along the rear and right walls. Inside the courtyard was a cook shed, chicken pen, vegetable garden, water tub to wash clothes, and a few lines for drying. The Aunt lived in the room at the elbow of the L.

Inside was a tiny room, painted blue, with a high ceiling, stone floor, and one window that could be closed with wooden shutters. The walls were bare except for a few bible verses written in Amharic and a framed photo of the Aunt when she was younger.

The Aunt was seated in a plain wood chair and invited us to sit on a bench. We showed her the photo album we had assembled for her. She smiled when she saw Meron, and commented that she had filled out enough to be barely recognizable. She smiled when she saw the picture of Emnet on the potty, commenting that Emnet had become really smart since going to the orphanage.

The interpreter read the letter we had written for the Aunt. Her facial expression was some blend of tired, resignation, and relief as she listened. Colleen and I held her hands almost the entire visit. She was as graceful and dignified as one could be given the situation.

During the visit we met Uncle Yebeletal (brother of your father), cousin Petros (his son), and cousin Hamnet (daughter of the Aunt). We learned your Father was a grower of barley, wheat, and almonds - and your Mother was a homesteader focused on being a good wife and mother.

Our visit lasted about 30 minutes, but I could have stayed for hours. There are so many questions I wanted to ask because I believe M&E will ask me some day. The social worker asked me to be sensitive and limit my questions to a few simple ones.

We drove away with a feeling of sadness and pity for this poor family, and a feeling of relief that the visit had been as positive as it was. I took a GPS reading of the plot in the event that M&E ever want to visit again.

Adoption Trip Day Two. Sat Feb 3

We awoke at the crack of dawn to the sound of Mosque chanting. I forgotten that Addis is half Muslim and we would hear this daily.

Awesome breakfast. Very heavy on ultra ripe mangoes, which I love.

Next we are escorted up the hill to the older kids house. It is behind an unmarked concrete wall and iron gate. You could never find this place nor recognize what it is, and that is intentional for security purposes.

Now inside, it is quiet. We can see many kids inside a glassed porch across the courtyard. Colleen and I are about a nanometer away from bursting into tears. The anticipation is killing us and it is so emotional.

The social worker holds our arms to pause us and says "I just want to warn you, the girls are very tiny. Much smaller than the photos indicate. I am telling you now so you won't be surprised when you see them."

Finally, Nanny Esegedich appears with Emnet, hands Emnet to Colleen, and explains to Emnet who Colleen is. Then Meron. Colleen and Meron are both dressed head to toe in the same shade of pink. It is a hilarious coincidence. Meron flashed her beautiful smile and clutched at Colleen. Esegedich told Meron we are Emama and Baba. Meron smiled and nodded her head yes.

The girls are really petite. There is no doubt they are only ages 2 and 4. Their limbs are so thin, almost fragile. The girls relaxed a bit as we gently stroked their faces and permitted them to touch our faces.

We spent the rest of the AM playing with all the kids. Soccer, singing, dancing, etc. The kids are so lovable. The kids we are most drawn to (other than our own) are:

Lidet and Abaynish - two sisters aged 3 and 5 going to New Hampshire

Adbit - a beautiful girl of about 10, mildly crippled by Polio, and possibly going to Atlanta

Yohannes and Rowina - of course. We came close to adopting them ourselves, and I had already nicknamed them Jay and Nina. This is a wonderful brother sister pair.

Mimi - an adorable 4 year old going to Connecticut. A total spitfire. I hope her family is prepared!

Nathaniel - a great six year old who loves all things camera, electronic, and gadget.

Rahel and Abram - Another brother/sister pair that are beautiful, smart, fun, and athletic.

Tizita - an adorable little girl of about 3 years old going to the Syracuse area.


After lunch, Pete and I went to Merkato. I had not planned to buy, but found myself wanting to buy pieces of the girls heritage to put in their room and give them a bond to their homeland. Clothes, carvings, paintings, tableware, music CDs. Spend away!!!!!!! What I loved about Merkato was the herds of goals and donkeys barrelling down the wide streets and narrow alleys. It was total pandemonium.

Late in the day we went back to the older kids house. Meron ran to us and Emnet ran away. She kept looking back over her shoulder and laughing, so we hope she was just playing.

A brief description of the orphanage. It is clean with lots of adult supervision, good discipline, and routines. During one visit, a truckload of new orphans arrived. The poor kids looked so frightened. They were immediately given a bath and clean clothes. THen they had blood drawn for tests, then they had lunch.

I have to say, every kid at HH is beautiful and fun. There is not one child here that I would refuse to adopt.

Adoption Trip Day One

Our first taste of Ethiopia comes in the departure lounge of Ethiopian Airlines at Dulles airport. There are many women in shawls and veils, many young children, and one particularly beautiful young girl with beads in her lovely braided hair. Several Ethiopians thank us and give us their blessing for saving two of their children and keeping sisters together (that's actually what they say).

On the airplane now, over the cold dark Atlantic, I find myself totally staring at all the Ethiopian women and wondering which ones my girls will grow up to look like. It is fun to play this imagination game.

After 30 hours of travel, we arrive in Addis and collect 3 of our 6 checked bags.

Mulat and Eskedar met us at Bole and drove us to Horizon House. Sinadu had heaping plates of chicken and pasta waiting for us. There are dozens of photos of previously adopted children on the walls. We recognize some of them like Dawit, Samuel, Bill and Michelle, and the Mannion twins. Note to future travellers. Have the latest info on previously adopted children living in your area because the staff adore hearing about the kids they once cared for.

There are huge portraits of Brad, Angelina, and Zahara on the wall. This is the first we knew that Angelina used HH to adopt. Lo and behold, Colleen and I have booked the Brangelina suite. Sweet!! Huge room. Sliders to the balcony overlooking the entrance yard. Huge master bath with huge tub.

Sleep well. Tomorrow we meet our daughters.